Tag Archive | Savior

Author Confessions: Managing Expectations

Dec23
Reading Time: 3 minutes

Author Confessions: Managing Expectations

Christmas is in two days! In November I had a last-minute surgery while trying to prepare for Christmas early and write 50,000 words for National Novel Writing Month. I’ve had inguinal hernia repair about thirteen years ago and thought, no problem. I’ve got this! I needed to have a lot done and out of the way so that I could take care of my husband in December after his reverse shoulder replacement on his left arm. He did the right one a few years back so we’ve been down this road before and I realized that this Christmas, and our sixth anniversary (yesterday), would of necessity be low-key and one of doing less, rather than more, over the holidays.

Christmas gifts that I was making got finished, wrapped under the tree (or in some cases in the mail). Hernia surgery was accomplished, due to a kind surgeon squeezing me in last minute but it was unexpectedly much more intensive than even he expected. Six weeks recovery means no lifting over 15 lbs so I’ll need to be careful with wood stove and make more trips when unloading groceries from the car up through January 2nd.

My daughter had a birthday as well (how can she be twenty?). Her gift was ready. She said to me though, “Mom, I don’t have a job right now. I’ll try to get you a Christmas gift for you, but don’t know if I’ll have the money to do that.”

That made me sad. Gifts are more than physical material things. They can include acts of service. She could come over and load my wood stove!  Or sit with her step-father and watch television while I go get my hair done. He’d probably be fine alone but that would definitely be a help and easy MY mind. Or just spending time together.

My love languages are words of affirmation and quality time, so her being here – just to hang out, or bake Christmas cookies together, or do a craft, would be a better gift than something she’d manage to find that I probably don’t need, to open on Christmas day.

That’s why I stopped giving my mom birthday gifts. What does she need? Instead, we are making memories. Last year we went to Kentucky to the Creation Museum and the Ark Encounter. This year we went to Branson (both of these being road trips for us). Next year we’re already planning on a trip to downtown San Antonio.TX, because for all her travels she’s never been to the Riverwalk (but I have). Making memories that last long after wrapping paper has been tossed away. I will confess, there are a few items under the tree for her!

With Christmas around the corner, how are you managing your expectations? Israel had waited a long time for a Messiah, and they didn’t know quite how to handle it when Jesus was finally born. Life is like that, isn’t it? We can plan and plan for things, but the unexpected can happen in a flash.

So, this is more for myself than anyone else. Take a deep breath. Relax. Sit. Savor the moments you have and don’t fret about a perfect gift, the best decorated tree, or the perfect holiday gathering. We got the best gift of all in a baby born on a dark night in less-than-ideal circumstances. Heaven came down to earth. Our Savior was born.

I love this song by Bryan Duncan, The Form of Man. Enjoy, and Merry Christmas!

 

Also Steven Curtis Chapman: This Baby

Memory Lane

Dec13
Reading Time: 3 minutes

Christmas memories accumulate like snowflakes, or ornaments on a tree. This year was the first that all three children decorated the tree by themselves. Every year they get an ornament, and I write their name and the year on it. It was fun this year to hear my 10,8 and almost 6 year old exclaim as they would hang their own treasures on the tree: “Oh, I remember this one!” and “Look! I was __(age) when I got this!”

The funniest part actually came before the ornaments, when my daughter said “Can we hang the garlic now?” (She meant garland). No vampires for our Christmas!

I remember the year after we moved, and we brought in our artificial tree from storage only to find that mice had made a home in the box and peed all over our tree. Oh, did that ever stink!  I figured it would be a tree-less Christmas until my hubby came up with the bright idea of soaking the tree in buckets of pine-sol in the bathtub. Yup, a disinfected tree that really did smell like pine!

I remember the Christmas after my daughter was born six years ago. We had been at Children’s Hospital for a week. I got to bring my precious daughter to church on Christmas Eve. I was overjoyed at this marvelous gift from God who let us keep her after her medical nightmare.  That was also the year we were blessed to be a part of the “Family Tree” at church and were given a gift card that was extravagantly more than expected.

Or how about the year when I got the tree up and my little girl managed to not only tip it over but break it in the middle? Irreparable. Had to get a new one. Totally would have expected one of my boys to have done this.

Or the year I invited a friend and her four boys over to bake and decorate Christmas cookies with us. Seven children and two adults in 7oo sq ft of space! One boy said “Wow, this is a lot of work!” It was also a lot of fun.

The kids look forward to Santa Claus coming at Grandma and Grandpa’s house. He didn’t make it last year. Something about falling out of a tree and breaking a leg. Thankfully my kids know the truth about Jolly Ole’ St. Nick and weren’t too terribly disappointed. Before you scold me on that, just realize, they still enjoy the tale and the imagination of it all even though if you ask them “What do you want Santa to bring you?” they will give you a blank stare.

2010 is a lean year. Usually there are gifts already piling up under the tree.  I put gifts under the tree as they arrive and get wrapped. We have no place to hide them. It adds to our enjoyment to see the colorful packages under the tree. So far there’s nothing there and the kids are beginning to get a bit worried! There will be something there by the end of this week, not a huge amount but something none-the-less.

My favorite part of the holiday is this: We slow down. We leisurely enjoy Christmas Eve with our church family, and celebrate the magic and wonder of Jesus coming to earth as an infant. We see the lights around town and go home to bed. In the morning we wake up when we are ready, and eventually we make a big breakfast. By 10 or 11 am we might sit and talk again about Christmas and what it means and then open gifts. Maybe later in the day we will visit with family – but generally the best times are just us celebrating our Savior together.

“Every heart that knows His name, lift your voice and sing

To the praise of God with us, this child Redeemer, King

There’s never been a greater love since the world began,

God the Father sent His Son and we held Him in our hand.

He wrapped His love in flesh and blood and took the form of man.”

(Bryan Duncan, “Form of Man”)