Author Confessions: Are You Seeking God’s Hand or His Heart?

Oliver Maltese/shih tzu mix.

When we got Oliver, he was a six-month-old puppy. I poured love on this dog and he became quite devoted to me. We did obedience training (more for me than him!) and the trainer didn’t think she could work with him because he loved me so much. Oliver understood she had treats though and performed beautifully for her and then quickly returned to me.

Oliver is motivated by praise as well as treats and I rarely give him the treats but lots of praise. His sister, Minnie, however, has been trained more by following Oliver as she hasn’t been motivated much by praise or treats. Two years in and she still will not take a treat from my hand. She will wag when I praise her but her stubborn shih-tzu heart refuses to do anything other than what she desires to do.

Years ago when I was attending a prayer retreat, the leader asked this question. Are you seeking God’s hand or his heart? 

Oliver will jump into my lap because he longs to be close to me. He loves

me. Of course he wants to snuggle and be petted too, but he’s often content to stretch out next to my legs because more than anything he longs to be with me.

He will dance for a treat though, but he doesn’t beg for them. He will go to my husband for the treats because Ben has conditioned the dog to do so. A previous dog of ours would go up to my husband in the kitchen and sneeze. Ben would give him a treat. Our dogs go to Ben for his hand, not his heart.

The dogs come to me more for my heart than my hand.

Of course we are told we are to seek God and pray to Him. Prayes of thankgiving, confession, requests, and even just sharing our lives.

Ultimately, as a believer, I long to hear God say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” Yes, God rewards us. The list of all the things I did for God should come after gratitude to Him for all I was able to do because He enabled me to, because I long to please Him.

That doesn’t mean I don’t pray for my children, or the health of friends or others who I know are struggling. I made a chart so I can be more intentional to pray for people outside of when I sense God is leading me to pray, which He often does.

I confess I’m often selfish in my prayers, seeking God’s hand more than His heart. Selfish in asking for His Wisdom, for the Holy Spirit to lead and guide in my conversations and relationships. One of my favorite psalms is Psalm 19 and verse 14 in particular: “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my rock and my Redeemer.” I find myself in an odd loop of seeking His hand so as to please His heart. A verse before that David prays, “Who can discern his errors? Acquit me of hidden faults.  Also keep back Your servant from presumptuous sins; Let them not rule over me;”  I’m not wrong in seeking His hand, His pierced hands that testify to His death for my sins. 

Someone asked me what they could pray for me. If you could ask for just ONE thing to be prayed for, would it be for a specific physical need for yourself or someone else? Ultimately, my prayer would be David’s that by the power of the Holy Spirit, my thoughts and words, my inner dialogue, the depth of my heart where sin likes to wallow, would be acceptable in His sight because I want to honor Him more than anything else.

So how about you? Are you seeking God’s hand or His heart? Seeking God’s heart gives us His hand, because we cannot do it without the help of the Holy Spirit.