Tag Archive | illness

Author Confessions: Are Some Sins Worse Than Others?

Reading Time: 7 minutes

Author Confessions: Are Some Sins Worse Than Others?

We often elevate certain sins as worse than others, even in the church. Now realize, nothing I’m saying here is to condemn anyone who struggles with issues. We all sin in some way, even if in our thoughts. I’m not exempt from that as much as I’d like to be as a follower of Christ. Even in my best efforts to honor Him I fall short on a daily basis, often without even realizing it.

In Christian fiction we try to not elevate any sin as acceptable. For instance, if a person drinks alcohol to excess, we highlight the negative consequences. My Gothic Regency novels have a statement at the beginning about how some of the drinking mentioned in the story, was a cultural thing and not intended to promote drinking or drunkenness. It was a fine line to be historically correct while not leading someone else into sin. “Well, if Marcus can drink than so can I, after all Susan M. Baganz put it in her novel. (The Virtuous Viscount).

When I started writing about dangerous emotions, I started with anger, because a pastor had preached about how it was sin. I disagree. You can check that out here: Author Confessions: The Dangerous Emotion of Anger.

The reality is, when God created the world, everything was good. There was no sin. God put Adam in headship over Eve, and that was good. Marriage was good. Nakedness was good. Sex was good. Emotions were good. Even mosqitoes were good. The fall corrupted everything, all of creation was impacted. Blood was shed and now we needed to cover our nakedness. Imagine on the Ark, all the animals. They were fed vegitation, not meat. Lions didn’t eat meat back then. All creation was originally designed for a vegitarian diet. After the flood, we were able to eat meat. Animal’s hunted, killed, and consumed prey. I’m not advocating for a vegitarian diet, just stating a biblically accurate historical fact.

Obviously killing animals for sacrifice happened before the flood as did killing other people (Cain and Abel). But no one ate meat until after the floods receded.

I digress but I think it’s important. Sin took everything wonderful and corrupted it. Everything is impacted and as generations go on, we see increases in genetic disorders, and chronic illnesses that were not as prevalent in previous generations. Now some of that might be due to environmental factors, and the food we consume, true, but still, it just shows that things move to disorganization and diease. The Second Law of Thermodynamics states that everything devolves. Now some state thht this isn’t true because the universe is not a closed system (required by that scientific law), however, there has never been any new  information added to our DNA added through natural processes, and our genetic code is devolving not evolving, hence, more physical disabilties. This occurs throughout creation, not just in human beings.

In essesence, sin impacts everything. Not just in our thoughts and behaviors, but everything from our physical well-being to weather.

If sin impacts everything, why do we consider some sinful actions worse than others? Why would a pastor condemn anger, but not addiction to caffiene? (We do serve coffee in our cafe at church). I have one friend who smokes occassionally and drinks occassionally. Her perspective is “I do not want anything like that to control me.” My husband doesn’t drink alcohol because “No one starts drinking planning to become an alcoholic.” While that is true, that does not mean people who drink (even Jesus drank wine in the Bible) are sinners. Scripture states that drinking alcoholic beverages is fine and can be beneficial in moderation. Drunkneess, however, is sin.

Moderation is not something Americans do well at. We are more of a culture of excess.

We could state that obesity is sin–but obesity can have many causes and perhaps only one of them is sin. When I was pregnant I could gain 10 lbs in two weeks without changing my diet. I’ve had Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis and it didn’t matter if my thyroid was high or low, I was tired (not lazy) and gained weight, without changing diet. The problem is, although medical issues can cause weight gain, once those core issues are resolved, doesn’t mean the body lets go of all that fat. There are many other causes for weight gain than overindulgance in food. Saying that, however, does not mean that we should just eat whatever we want, just because we can. I’m guilty of not always making wise choices with food.

Our society has approved of things Scripture clearly states as sin: homosexuality, murder (including abortion), slandar, lies, wife-beating, drugs, drinking, buying favors, injustice. Now, let’s make a distinction with homosexuality as an example. One can have urges and desires and not act on those. It is the act of homosexuality that God condemns. So we can love and embrace a person who struggles with this issue without condoning a behavior.

Why do we elevate some sins over another? Suspected murders are raising money and villifying the person murdered. Lies are whipped up to convict people who don’t agree with a person’s political views even while committing the sins they are trying to charge someone else with. (Isn’t that called gaslighting?)

While I am all for justice, we have seen that perverted as sin impacts humans and their judgement. We all have our biases when it comes to everything, don’t we? How often do we evaluate those in light of Scripture?

Thinking about killing someone is the same as doing the act according to Scripture. Jesus was, as I have said, the first and greatest cognitive behavioral therapist. Thoughts, words, and actions come from our heart and what we dwell on in our minds. They are intimately connected. In many issues, the worst of sin is in our thoughts and minds.

Matthew 5:28: “But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

Matthew 15:19: “…out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.”

Matthew 22:37: “Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’”

Mark 7:20-22: He [Jesus] went on: “What comes out of a person is what defiles them. For it is from within, out of a person’s heart, that evil thoughts come—sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly.

Luke 6:25: “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.”

Some religions focus on big sins, i.e. murder, abortion, sex outside of marriage (adultary and fornication), homosexuality. Some make rules that have nothing to do with sin but they treat it as such: girls must have long hair and wear skirts or dresses, men must have short hair, no makeup, no listening to secular music. No going to movies or having friends who are not of the same religious sect as you are. These are all surface issues though, aren’t they? By the way, the Pharisees did this as well. Some of those sins have negative real life consequences that are more obvious. Other, “lesser” sins can just as equally scar the soul but never be seen or called out.

All sins are equally bad at the foot of the cross.

We need to be careful to judge the sin of others. Judging is another topic. A huge one and not part of today’s post.

The reality is, while we all have a sin problem, and sin contaminates everything in this world, including our thinking and our hearts, we need to be careful and evaluate ourselves before pointing out the sins of others. I have sins I am aware of, battles that go on in my mind. Some of them I verbalize to a therapist or a close friend or two, only those who love and follow Jesus. Otherwise they would not understand. See, I can mistakenly condemn myself for things that are not even sin.

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind, and with all your strength.

(Matthew 22:37, Mark 12:30 also Luke 10:27 but in a different order).

All of those start with the heart. Our sin is ultimately an internal issue for each of us. What we focus on impacts that greatly. Luke 12:34: “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”

So, instead of focusing on sin, perhaps we should focus on our treasure, Jesus Christ. It is only through the power of the Holy Spirit that we are able to transform any of those areas of ourselves impacted by sin: heart, mind, soul, and strength. Our behaviors flow out of that, whether good or bad. We cannot do this on our own strength. When we are focusing on loving God, and seeking Him for His active Presence in our lives, and not what He can give us or what prayers He can answer, then we have the ability to battle our sin and become transformed more and more into the likeness of Christ. Thankfully, when we submit our lives to Christ, and accept His perfect sacrifice on the cross, then we are seen by God as pure and holy as Christ is, even though on this side of Heaven we will still battle sin. We don’t do it alone.

I’m not saying we cannot talk about sin and what God calls sin in the Old and New Testaments. We should. An invisible standard isn’t a help to anyone. Even children need to know where the boundaries are. When God calls something sin it was because He is protecting us. It’s is funny to me how people will get all bent out of shape about divorce (another topic perhaps for another time) but find murder in times of war acceptable. Isn’t murder also sin? Yet King David went to war, but first killed Goliath for mocking God and demeaning His people. Jesus even said divorce was acceptable because hearts are hard. Jesus did not elevate marriage as an idol to be worshipped at the expense of the life and well-being of a wife or husband who is being verbally, physically, or emotionally abused or abandoned by a spouse whose heart is hard. (Check out this article for more). In contrast, adultery by as spouse doesn’t always mean divorce should be the go-to solution.

Why are some sins worse than others? Because it is easier to call out the things we see, the outward behaviors, in others, than it is to deal with the true issue of our own hearts. I’m not going to ask you to expose your own sins here on my blog (you won’t anyway) but maybe it’s time to take stock and spend time in His Word and savor the treasure we have in Jesus so we can be better equipped to battle the sins in our heart.

Minnie’s Remarks: Lillian’s Last Christmas (Book Review)

Reading Time: 2 minutes

It’s Minnie again. I’m glad Mom is giving me an opportunity here. Karen Malley’s latest Christmas novella, Lillian’s Last Christmas, could sound like a downer, but if you knew this Christmas would be your last, how would you celebrate it? The way that Lillian does has an impact that goes far beyond the grave.

Lillian hasn’t seen her college friends for some time but they had such wonderful memories together and had stayed connected through the years of life and hardships. Unfortunately, Lillian is facing the biggest of those but it is one that brings her peace and joy and she wants her friends to experience that as well. So she invites them to her home to celebrate Christmas with her.

When her four friends arrive she shares her sad news along with the joy that comes from Jesus and Christmas and her desire to experience that with them all. Her friends react in shock and dismay but decided to make this the best Christmas ever by celebrating major holidays she’ll miss next year, including her birthday. Each bring gifts and distinct personalities to the fun and their friendship grows stronger as they celebrate life, and a looming death.

Will Lillian get the dearest wish of her heart to see her four closest friends come to know the peace that can only be found in Jesus? You’ll have to read it to find out. If Lillian gets her wish, the party will someday continue in heaven which sounds like a wonderful Christmas gift to all.

I give this story five bones. Please pick up Karen Malley’s unique Christmas story, Lillian’s Last Christmas. It might challenge you to more purposeful as you  go through the upcoming holiday season. Oh, and leave a nice review after you’ve read it. It helps out an author a lot!

 

 

 

Author Confessions: Satan Doesn’t Like Christian Authors

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Author Confessions: Satan Doesn’t Like Christian Authors

This idea should be more of a “duh” kind of thing. Of course Satan doesn’t like Christian authors—he’s diametrically opposed to Christ, the gospel and those who are trying to honor God in the exercise of their spiritual gifts.

So why bother writing about it? Because we too often forget we are in a spiritual battle.

Not that every challenge or bad thing that happens to us can be pinned on our mortal foe. We can easily make life more difficult without his help.

But when I’m afraid to write because I believe it won’t be good enough, then I’m believing a lie. My unbelief in God’s power to work in and through me, is a great tool for the enemy to use to keep me from exercising my gifts and calling.

When something bad happens, like last year I tripped and fell and broke my right humerus (arm), that wasn’t really the devil’s fault. Some of it had been a result of my inability to get medication I needed because of insurance and supply chain issues. I could just blame Satan, the insurance company, the FDA, the pharmaceutical companies, but to what end? I could blame myself for being impulsive, inattentive, and clumsy. I could blame the UPS guy for leaving the box of brakes for my car where I would trip over them. That’s not fair though because I could have moved them. I saw them there! That goes back to blaming myself for being lazy. I could blame God for allowing it.

What have I accomplished by any of that? God graciously provided me with so many blessings in the midst of that intense pain. My dog stayed by my side. I was able to get to my husband who took exceptional care of me, even untying my shoes as I blacked out in a chair. Only to have me waking up to say “they zip”. Excellent medical care at the emergency room with a wait of less than ten minutes? That’s unusual to be sure!

I didn’t need surgery and the dire warnings of the first doctor I saw a few days later never came to pass (at least to this date). My rotator cuff could have been reinjured necessitating surgery, or the bone head could have died due to cutting off the blood flow with the break requiring a shoulder replacement. As far as I am aware, fifteen months later, I’m fine.

The reality is, bad things happen all the time. Job didn’t even know that his deepest griefs were because God had lifted protection over him and allowed Satan access. The point of that was to keep trusting God even when things go wrong, because we have no idea what’s going on behind-the-scenes.

The only way to do that is to stay connected to the One who controls it all, including our enemy. Sometimes catastrophe comes and however God allows those things to happen, due to someone else’s sin, or our own (natural consequences), or nature itself, or perhaps our enemy, we need to trust Him and focus on Him.

I was so sad when our vacation had cancelled due to my arm. But I did believe that somehow God was in that. We did take a different trip after I’d healed up enough and during that trip my husband and I were able to share the gospel with a young man who was clearly hurting. We spent several hour with him over a meal. Right then and there I knew my broken arm wasn’t wasted.

Now I’ve already written on God knowing everything so I won’t go into that there. God could have done something similar on our initial trip too. The reality is God is always at work and need to keep focused on Him.

Keeping our hearts clean before God keeps us in step with the Holy Spirit who will help us when evil comes knocking, whether it is in life, vacations, health, work, or yes, even writing. We can grieve our losses on the way but never stop clinging to God and the power He gives us through the Holy Spirit.

The enemy doesn’t stand a chance. Satan hates Christian authors but he’s not the one I’m going to focus on. Instead I’ll keep working as God leads me through the power and protection of the Holy Spirit and trust Him for the results.

More than Friends (Short Story)

Reading Time: 10 minutes

She paced back and forth for several minutes. She knew he watched her as he clicked his pen. She stopped in front of him. “Trent, how do you see our relationship?”

Trent swallowed and dropped the pen on his desk that mirrored hers, “I want us to be friends.”

She jerked her head back as if she had been slapped and blinked back the tears. “Friends.”

“Yeah, we’ve worked together for so long now. You’ve been a partner and a friend and I would hate to mess with a winning combination.”

She took a deep breath and swallowed the shudder of pain that threatened her composure. She turned away and looked out the window to the panoramic view of the city spread out before her. A city they patrolled together. A city whose dark secrets taunted their skills as detectives.

“Why do you even ask such a thing? Valerie, what’s this about?”

She shook her head. “Nothing.” Her shoulders drooped. She had been in love with Trent for years, but the recent diagnosis from the doctor reminded her that life was finite. She wasn’t willing to settle for less than she desired anymore. She couldn’t imagine life without Trent in it. He had been her past, her present, and she hoped, her future. That hope died a tragic death with his words.

She picked up her coat, put it on and moved to the door.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” He asked.

She glanced back at him and didn’t answer. She wanted to imprint the memory of the way he looked: dark eyes under thick bushy brows and almost black hair trimmed close to his head. He looked younger than his thirty-five years. She felt much older than her own thirty.

“I don’t . . . no, you won’t.” She saw the question in his eyes, as his head tilted to one side. She owed him an explanation didn’t she?  “I handed in my notice today. I’m on medical leave.” Before he could ask questions she slipped out the door, turned right and headed down the back stairs knowing he would think she had gone through the office cubicle area if he tried to follow her.

She reached her car, got in, drove out of the parking garage and headed into the country. She wanted to hide and lick her wounds. Her body was defeating her. Her emotions ran riot from anger to despair to depression to futility. What was the point in going on? Why fight the inevitable? She didn’t have the money and she didn’t have the courage on her own. But was it even fair to ask that of a man? To love her at her lowest point and be there for her? How selfish was she anyway? She brushed away errant tears and pulled over into a wildlife preserve and parked.

Image courtesy of Evgeni Dinev / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image courtesy of Evgeni Dinev / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

She exited the car, threw her holster and gun in the trunk and left her phone on the dash. She locked the vehicle and hiked up the trail into the shadows cast by the tall oaks, maples and pines surrounding her. The temperature was cooler here and she hugged her jacket a little tighter to her chest. The woods were silent with the exception of the sound of her feet crunching leaves and branches that had fallen on the dirt path.

She reached the top of a cliff and sat on a rock that was perched just a few feet back from the ledge. She leaned forward with her elbows on her knees and looked out at the meandering creek bed below as it appeared in between gaps in the trees. The sun shimmered off a particular tree making the leaves look white. She had never figured out what kind of tree that was. It had always fascinated her. She shook her head at her errant thoughts.

How had she come to this pass? Thirty years of age, single and in love with a man who didn’t want to be more than a partner and friend. The struggle she had ahead of her though required more than that. Her best friend, Danielle was a town away, but she had her hands full with her husband and two kids. She couldn’t ask for Dani’s help. Val shook her head. She could and Danielle would be torn by the desire to say yes and the reality that her life was already full beyond bursting. Dani didn’t need the added burden.

Her parents were too far away. They had their own health issues and were not capable of dealing with hers as well. They had never really understood her. She’d probably shoot herself before a week was out if she went to live with them. Her church? Who could be there day by day through the weeks and months ahead? No one person. No team of many and she would be uncomfortable with that. Was she too independent to lean on them?

Suicide? She looked up to heaven. So, Lord, who is there for me besides You? I don’t know if I can face this alone and that’s all I feel right now. Alone. I’m too young to be placed in a nursing home for care as I battle but that’s what the future seems to hold and I can’t bear it or afford that kind of care. Why even fight if that’s what I have to look forward to?

The heavens were silent as fluffy cirrus clouds floated past looking like cotton candy, tinged pink with the rays of a sun descending along the distant horizon. She had always believed that suicide was wrong. Allowing the disease to claim her without intervention was an option, though. Even with insurance she didn’t have the resources to fight. Without the prescribed treatment, she may be able to have a pretty decent, although shorter, life with the help of the pain medications they would give her, but wasn’t that just a passive way of killing herself?

She stood up and looked over the cliff. She remembered repelling it with Trent as part of a recertification exercise. She had never feared falling with him by her side. She had rarely felt fear even in the tensest circumstances when he was there.

But he wasn’t here now and wouldn’t be. She couldn’t bear the thought of him watching her slow death. But isn’t that exactly what she had wanted?

It’s not fair, Jesus. It’s just not fair. She had read the research. She knew that those who had a close support system, like a spouse, fared far better though treatment and had a greater likelihood of eventual healing. For months she  prayed that God would heal her and yet the latest blood work had shown progression. She would never return to her work. She would never enjoy coffee in the mornings with Trent as they discussed their current cases. She would never celebrate with him when one was solved and justice brought for the victims. She would never know the love of a husband for a wife. She would never be a mom.

She sat on the ground with her back leaning against the rock and let the tears fall again as grief twisted her dying body like a washcloth being squeezed of its moisture.

If only she had the courage . . .

* * *

            Trent had searched everywhere. He panicked. Valerie was not answering her phone or returning text messages. That was not like her. He called Danielle.

“Have you heard from Val?”

“No. Why?” Dani sounded rushed and he heard a baby wail in the background.

“She asked about our relationship. I told her I wanted to be friends and she left the office with a throwaway line about medical leave. She’s disappeared. I’m worried about her, she didn’t seem herself.”

“She hasn’t been herself for months, Trent.”

“I know. Every time I’ve asked she’s changed the subject. She’s lost weight too.”

Dani sighed, “Listen, Trent, if you want my opinion, you are a fool to not move things forward with her. She has to be in love with you to have put up with you these past few years.”

Trent rolled his eyes. This was why he tried to avoid contacting Dani. One, he hated going behind Valerie’s back and two, Dani was so in love that she thought everyone else should be as well, especially him and Val. “It’s kind of a mute point right now. She’s missing.”

“Since you are not her husband I guess you should go home and wait for her to call you when she’s good and ready. She’s an adult, Trent. She can take care of herself.”

For some odd reason, that’s what he was afraid of.

He parked the car in front of her apartment complex and went to the interior hallway. He knocked but there was no answer. He suspected as much since her car was absent from the lot. He sat down on the floor by the door and waited. And prayed.

Why was he reluctant to take things to a next level with this woman? He’d been in love with her long before they had become partners. Every time he lay alone in bed at night he wished that she was there to share his hopes and dreams with. The image of his mother crying when his father had left and the pain of the divorce had left him fearful of ever considering marriage. His mother had aged overnight and never recovered from the rejection by her husband. He was the spitting image of his father and that alone also reminded her daily of her loss and pain. How could he ever do something like that to Val? The risk was too high. He felt that staying single was better than hurting someone he loved.

But it seemed like he had hurt her anyway. Was his refusal to move things forward a form of rejection to her? He leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. And waited some more.

The cool blast of air hit him as he heard the back door to the apartment complex close. Soft footsteps came towards him and in the dim lighting he saw her stooped shoulders. He glanced at his watch. It was past ten. Her head lifted. She saw him and stopped. Her solemn expression didn’t change. Her eyes were bloodshot and her blonde hair escaped her ponytail. She looked—worn.

He watched as Val took a few more steps to the door and put the key in. Trent rose to his feet and stood behind her. She pushed the door open and stood aside, head bent, as he entered. The door shut and the bolt found home with a solid thunk.

Neither spoke. She dropped her purse and keys on a kitchen chair. Trent reached forward to help her take her coat off. He hung the coat up on the rack by the door, and took two steps back to her and placed his hands on her shoulders. She looked up into his eyes and he saw bleakness there.

He bent his head forward and tentatively placed his lips to hers. How many times had he dreamed of doing this? Her arms came up around his neck drawing them closer. He tasted the saltiness of her tears. He pulled his head back and wrapped his arms around her as she cried. His heart cracked.

Image courtesy of photostock / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image courtesy of photostock / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

“Where’s your gun?”

She hiccupped and backed way. “Locked in my trunk. I didn’t trust myself to have it close right now.”

He closed his eyes for a moment and silently thanked God. He opened them and watched as Val walked into her cozy living room and sat down on a chocolate suede loveseat. She picked up and hugged a teal pillow to her chest and patted the seat next to her. He did not hesitate to join her there.

“I’ve looked everywhere for you,” he whispered.

“I’m sorry to have worried you, but I’m not your responsibility.” She rested her chin on the top of the pillow.

“Maybe that should change.”

Her head jerked up to look at him. “You made it clear . . .”

“I’ve been an idiot, Val. Blind and afraid. I don’t know what’s going on but whatever it is I want to be there for you as you go through it.” He reached over and grabbed a hand, surprised that she allowed him to.

“I was wrong, Trent. I was wrong to insinuate I wanted more from you than to be friends. You’ve been one of the best. I couldn’t ask you walk my journey with me. It would not be fair to you.”

“What journey? Shouldn’t I be able to decide what I’m willing to do?”

Her hazel eyes were grey, with flecks of green and looked sadder than he ever recalled seeing her, with the swollen lids from the tears she had cried. “I’m dying, Trent.”

He shook his head. No. Not this vibrant, beautiful woman sitting in front of him. A vice gripped his heart. “No.” It came out harsher and stronger than he intended and she startled at the sound.

“Very much so, yes. With treatment I might have remission, but it’s expensive and beyond my means. Without it, I may be have six to nine months left.”

“Then we will marry right away.”

“Wow, Trent, now there’s a proposal to sweep a girl off her feet.”

“I’m sorry. You deserve better than that, and a much better man as well.”

“Don’t say that. I could never have picked a better man to be my partner and friend. I’m going to miss seeing you every day.”

She started to rise but he held her fast and pulled her onto his lap and trapped her in the circle of his arms. “Valerie, I have loved you, I think, from the day I first met you. Your hair was braided down your back like twists of sunlight and your bangs swept to the side. Your eyes lit up when you smiled. You were never intimidated by the guys and treated them all like your brothers, which is odd because I know you don’t have any. Every guy wanted to get close to you but I managed, somehow, to gain your favor and I’ve always treasured that. I don’t want to lose you as a partner or a friend. I want to talk to you after a long day of work as I hold you in my arms. I want your kiss to be the last thing I experience before I walk out the door in the morning. I want to hold you when you cry and be the one to make you laugh. However long we have together, please, be my wife and make all the other officers insanely jealous of me.”

She giggled and put and arm around him and their lips met.

***

            Home was found in Trent’s arms. This was what she had always dreamed and hoped for, only reality surpassed her fantasies. She broke the kiss and leaned her forehead against his. “It’s not fair to ask you to marry a dying woman.”

“Who said I’m going to let you die?” His voice was a growl and his eyes were as dark as Turkish coffee. She could feel the stubble on his chin as her hand came to caress his face.

“You have enough pull with God to stay my execution?”

“No. But if love and prayer can keep you with me for the next fifty years, you had better believe I’m going to bathe every moment in both of them.”

She looked into those eyes and felt hope again. “Then, yes, Trent. I will marry you.”

***

            Fifty years, three children, eight grandchildren and ten great-grandchildren later, Valerie sat next to the man who looked as handsome as when she first met him even though his hair was now a distinguished silver. They held hands as their family celebrated around them. When the music played he stood and helped her to her feet and they walked out onto the dance floor.

“I’m so glad I married you, Valerie.” She heard a huskiness in his voice as he drew her into the circle of his arms.

“I love you, Trent.” She whispered as she relished the touch of his hands on her.

His eyes shone with love for her as they often did. A love that had given her courage for a battle she had never asked for. A love that had won. She swayed with him and turned her face up to his. He knew what she was asking for. He bent his head and their lips met and time stopped. Her heart welled with love and gratitude for an illness that brought them together as more than partners and friends, but as lovers as well.

When the kiss broke she winked at him and he grinned. The room around erupted in applause and somehow she knew God was smiling too.